Saturday, February 12, 2011

A (belated) letter

Mia,

Your characters have totes been busy with other stuff (as you will soon see) so you can hardly blame them for being a day late and contacting a third party to help them do this. Hardly. Geez. It's not like you were in a rush to do anything to do. They should know, they've been watching you. Anyway, here's how it's going to go down.

Somebody has taken your most prized pen and notebook as of 11am on Saturday the 13th of February 2011 and they may or may not want payment.

Yeah, that's right, they finally did it. It's not hidden about the house where you can find it, oh no, suffice it to say the notebook and corresponding pen are tied up in a bundle and hidden somewhere really secure but not actually safe. This bundle may be dangling over an open flame as we speak, it's hard to tell what with all the smoke coming from over where everyone is standing.

So. There's you dilemma for you. You have no notebook. They kidnapped it and now your WIP hangs in the balance.  You have twenty four hours to deliver the ransom. What ransom? Well that's easy because there is a list.




1. Your characters will do more sighing/winking/eyebrow raising/weird breathing unless absolutely you might die if they don't necessary.

2. Everyone gets Heelys.

3. Cheese.

4. Stop ending chapters on cliffhangers and exploding things because you get stuck.

5. Less waking your characters up at unreasonable hours and more drinkies for us... er, I mean them. They want the drinkies. *whistles*  They have a Union, you know.



And there you are. No more and no less. You have twenty four of your earthling hours. Do not disappoint or they swear your notebook with the ideas will meet an untimely demise. They are so not kidding this time.

Yours expectantly,

An interested party.

p.s. I would give the bathroom, like, five minutes because this interested party may or may not have made it a bit fragrant whilst we were popping by to get some sugar. Not from the toilet, from the fridge, I just needed to use the bathroom too. Wait, shoot, I switched to first person again.

3 comments:

  1. lol lol lol lol
    HEELYS OMG. ZOMBIES WEARING HEELYS.

    #WeshouldTOTESdothistoThor

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh no! Not the notebook!

    lol

    But umm, hate to tell you ransomers people but some of the demands will have issues against writing advice published authors give. Many recommend cliffhanger endings for chapters. Oh and I've heard people say that if a scene is really boring, blow something up. But some of the others demands could be reasonable.

    Good luck Mia. Hope you get your stuff back. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow, Mia! Your characters are going to some length to get your attention. Lol.

    ReplyDelete

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